Monday, October 10, 20058:35 PM

Day of Revelation


Today I went for a photoshoot. It's to promote DET and um... solve the problem of the shortage of girls... Quite fun... maybe I'll post some pics in Friendster... Ha... Hopefully it will attract more girls in. If not, my efforts are wasted... I hate taking pics in the glaring sun. It sucks!


Mr Koh says Kero will still continue with next semester. Seriously, that is the WORST news in history!!! !&#!$# Damn. Things never go well nowadays. The stupid Breadtalk guy didn't call. It's a complete waste of time.


So I went with Dan and Alv-kun to Yew Tee to apply for some tuition assistant post. Apparently, we have to submit a resume via email. I was like, "WT*?" cos, they'd rather we email then do a personal walk-in. So we stayed at Mac's and talk rot. Haha. Alot of Unity people cramming for their EOYs... I miss my sec sch cramming days too... Ah... Youth... *switches to reminiscing mode*


I really don't regret choosing poly... Seems like I won't be able to adapt to JC life anyway. Ha... I didn't voice out much on my personal life in NYP cos, they 'overpower' me. *laughs* And they are guys anyway... They don't understand...


K... now the question most people are asking me... How did I survive 1 sem with 20 guys? Answer is simple. TOLERATE!!! But still, tolerance has a limit. I absoultely Hate it when someone treats me like a guy, or purposely calls me a guy, or leave me out because I'm not a guy. This really sucks. And it hurts even more when someone remarks, "Why this course no girls de?" Aren't I one?


I'm sorry, I'm not pretty. It's my fault I'm not gentle, and I definitely do you guys wrong by not having that perfect figure and dislike wearing mini-skirt because I lack that figure. Even if you all never said that, I heard those words unspoken. It hurts more than anything, because I could never be like Puma-girl or even close to her.


Yes, I'm jealous. Because I'm also a girl. But I'm not treated like one. No one cared about what I was feeling. Maybe guys are like that. Maybe guys don't care. But whatever it is, I don't want my good impression of most guys to change. I don't want to think that all guys are superficial, and all guys only want the proverbial 'girl in the lotus', ie: perfect, pure. No one is perfect. I don't want to feel hurt and undignified because of my flaws. I don't wish to face silent comparison from you, just because I can never be like that girl or whatever.


I'm just me. Take it or leave it. That's how I intend to be, unwillingly. You people prolly never thought of this. I wanted to be like Puma-girl. Do you know I envy her? I know I can never get the attention she gets. It's not fair, Life isn't fair. I mean, her BF is nothing to talk about. Tong looks 10 times better than him. But I'm still envious of the attention. I mean, which girl doesn't want nice attention?


Bla. I'm just an ugly duckling hoping to be a swan. I doubt it'll happen. Miracles exist but I think I used mine up... Miracles are just like the shooting stars.Beautiful but elusive... And only the most fortunate people can see it... I guess I don't have the fortune... *sad*

All works done by Princess Teddy

This is Princess Teddy